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Wednesday, July 30, 2008

This TIme It is Kinky

Mums! The real harbinger of fall! The geese are starting to travel, the barn swallows are gone - it's time to change the decor on the porch from summer to fall.


SO, I went up to Mrs. King's to get some mums - giant ones, she's got - 3.49 at piece, unless you get 7 in which case she gives you the 8th one free.


I get eight, load them in the truck and go in to pay. Guess who's at the checkout? C's sister Nancy. We make artificial small talk, it's painful.


When I get home I spend about an hour staring at the porch and trying to figure out the best way to get all the dead annuals out of the pots, throw out the potting soil (which is about five years old) and get the pots down the stairs. It seems easiest to empty the pot over the rail into the bed of the little trailer I can put on the back of the golf cart and then haul it to the manure pile, where it will be regenerated over the winter into GOOD potting soil.


I get potting soil all over the porch doing this, so I decide I have to wash it off with the hose. I get the new curly hose out. Not sure I like it though, it tends to kink.


When I get finished washing off the porch, I move to the front steps. Now in order to do this the easiest way, I pull the golf cart and trailer ALL THE WAY UP the path in front of the steps. I realize too late that this may mean I have to back the trailer up - something I am not good at. I defer that decision until I am finished. 


It's dark when I finally get all the mums planted, all the pots emptied and the path washed off with the curly hose. I'm still not nuts about the curly hose - as I said, it kinks. I'm ready to move that trailer now. I think it will probably be easier if I pull it forward even through some bushes, than it would be too back it down the little hill, possibly jack knifing it.


All seems to be going well. As I pull around the front, I show off by picking up the trash can from the front yard - like a rodeo princess - without even stopping the cart. No one is watching, but I feel good about it.


Turning right around the house, I notice the golf cart is slowing down and the trailer isn't rolling right. Even if I PUSH THE GAS IN ALL THE WAY, the damn thing is slowing down. The cart is cocked at a funny angle. I take my foot off the gas and the golf cart actually goes BACKWARDS about fifteen feet. Completely on its own! Weird!


I think to myself, I better get off and see what the deal is. In the dark I notice something light green and thin protruding from behind the rear left wheel. In the dark, I run my hand under the wheel. The first thing I feel is the nozzle to the hose snug up against the axle. The next thing I feel is the hose - completely tensed, now about 1/4 of an inch in diameter, ready to recoil the minute the tension is relieved. My new curly hose is stretched twice it's original length, tight.


Of course, the water is still on, adding to the drama.


I try to back the trailer up to loosen the situation up. The trailer jackknifes. The hose doesn't come off.


I unscrew the nozzle, turn the water off. Try to lift the cart. Nothing. The hose is jammed up between the axle and the wheel. In fact, it's wrapped around twice. 


I figure out the best thing to do is detach the hose from the faucet and drive the golf cart forward dragging the hose with it, around the house to where there was more light. I figure when I release the tension on the hose, it will spring back to it's convenient curly shape. No, it doesn't. I now have a 25 dollar, 1/4 inch diameter perfectly straight hose that leaks attached to my trailer. Much like the others that I was trying to replace. Except it doesn't seem to kink anymore.


When C. got home he was able to get the hose out from around the axle. But it still leaks and no longer curls up.  The mums look good though. 

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